Why this book exists
A focused place to understand what is happening
Deirdre was known, all her life, as the calm one. She was fifty-one, and everyone who knew her would have described her the same way: easy-going, unflappable, patient, nice. She did not shout. She did not sulk. She did not, as far as anyone could remember, ever really lose her temper. When she was treated badly, when other people would have been furious, Deirdre stayed calm, smoothed things over, saw the other person's point of view, let it go. She was proud of this, mostly. She was not an angry person. And she was, when she finally came to understand herself, one of the angriest people she had ever met. The anger was all there, decades of it, every legitimate fury she had never felt, every injustice she had smoothed over, every time she had been.
The writing is designed to reduce shame, bring the underlying pattern into view and give you practical ways to respond without pretending that every life follows the same formula.
